Who stole the pancakes?
by UrusVerra
Summary: A serious crime was commited aboard the Normandy. Who is to blame? One-shot.


_This story was meant to be my home task composition, but it turned out to be a fan fiction. Have fun and feel free to criticize!)_

_Many thanks for LivingLow, who put a lot of effort correcting my mistakes._

This story happened in the end of 2185 – a few days before the New Year. During my whole service in Citadel Security I had never heard about any similar accident.

It was a usual evening for C-Sec. Crimes were committed, gangs killed people, cops couldn't sort things out and my working time was coming to its end. I was about to leave my place and go home, when Captain Bailey – my boss – called me. Wondering what Bailey might have needed me for, I came to his office.

Captain told me, that I'd get a new assignment the next day. On my comment that the next week was supposed to be my vacation, he answered that he will double my days off if I accepted the assignment. When I asked if it was a volunteer job, he replied that it was voluntary, but that he was _asking__me_ to take it. I hesitated a bit, but then agreed.

The matter turned out to be very sensitive. Bailey informed me that no longer than an hour before the human Councilor himself called for him and asked for a favor – to secretly investigate an accident on the _Normandy_ – the Alliance's vessel that now served as the prison for _commander__Shepard_.

The Commander was an extraordinary person. The first human SpecTRe, savior of the Citadel, the first person ever to come through Omega-4 relay and return alive: he was now charged of a terrorism. Many people claimed him to be the one who destroyed a batarian system and killed hundreds of thousands batarians. Some even matched Shepard to _Saren,_ the rogue SpecTRe who attacked the Alliance's colony Eden Prime two years ago and was punished then by commander himself.

Shepard now lived on the Normandy – his vessel, which he surrendered to the Alliance. It was docked in the military docks at the time and was well guarded. I wondered what could have happened aboard the Normandy.

Bailey said that the Councilor hadn't yet filled him in. He only asked to send a single agent to find out what happened. He also asked to keep it quiet, so there would be no leaks into the mass media.

I was exited to get a job like that – for me it meant working a side by side with the galaxy's best (well, at least that's what I heard about Shepard and his team). But I was also terrified. Who knew what kind of crime had been committed there? With an uneasy feeling I left to the _Normandy_the next morning.

When I arrived, I was amazed by the view of the _Normandy_. She was gorgeous – even staying in the dock, she inspired power, energy and wealth. I imagined myself what she was like on the run, cutting the black void of the space...

When I entered the airlock of the ship, a synthesized female voice spoke:

"Stand by, intruder. Please, attach your ID to the scanner."

I did what a VI had asked. Virtual intelligences weren't rare on such a vessels: they served a number of purposes like collecting information or launching distress beacons in case of an emergency. They also served as some kind of interface to the ship.

"Thank you, Detective Sergeant. You now may proceed to the ship," said the VI and the door in front of me opened with a slight "swoosh." I entered.

I'd heard before that the _Normandy_ was originally created by human and turian engineers, but I could never have imagined myself how it affected its interior. This vessel was different from any ship I've seen before: on my left there was a cockpit, where the pilot should have been, but his seat was empty. On my right there was a corridor that led to the Combat Information Center.

Two tall men came to me. One of them stepped forward.

"Detective Sergeant, I presume? I'm Commander Shepard and this is Lieutenant James Vega. He is my, er... Warden," a sun-tanned soldier, who stood behind the commander, nodded, "It's a pleasure to meet you, though I wish it was under different circumstances."

"It's my honor to be here, Commander," I shook the hand the living legend of my time offered me.

"Lets go to the debriefing room, the crew is waiting there. Do you know what happened here, detective?" asked the Commander.

"No sir."

"Then I'll fill you on our way."

He gestured and we moved towards the CIC, the tanned soldier silently following us. After Shepard told me what happened, I was speechless. Then I spoke:

"You want me to find out who... _Who__stole__the__pancakes?_"

Shepard nodded, the expression on his face was calm and serious. There was no doubt – he wasn't kidding.

"Indeed. As I said, Mess Sergeant Gardner left the pancakes in the ship's kitchen today. When he returned all the pancakes had disappeared. There were only six people on the Normandy that day, including me and the Lieutenant. They all are waiting in the debriefing room."

"Er... Commander, what kind of punishment do you think the thief will get?" I carefully asked. I didn't want to offend Shepard, but his request seemed at the very least odd.

"Don't worry, he'll get what he deserves. Your work is to find who it was and we'll decide what to do with him... Or her," Shepard looked directly in my face and grinned. "I can see you don't understand how serious the situation is. Look, every single person on this ship is an pancake addict. Every Saturday we all come down in the mess hall and eat pancakes. The one who stole them not only offended our mess sergeant, he also betrayed the crew."

I desperately gazed back at Lieutenant Vega. What if the mass media was right, what if Shepard really had gone mad? But Vega's face was no less serious than Shepard's – he caught my gaze and nodded, acknowledging the Commander's words. I sighed. Okay. Pancakes...

We came to the debriefing-communications room. The door opened and we entered. There were already a few people in the room: two humans and...

"Oh my god!" I shivered, staring with an uncovered terror onto the last "person," who stood in front of me.

Two years ago, after Saren led the army of synthetic soldiers known as geth on Eden Prime, everyone in the galaxy knew how dangerous geth were. True AI, created by quarians – the race of genius tech-experts – who once drew their creators from their homeworld and after that weren't seen outside of their system for three hundred years.

But then the rogue SpecTRe somehow persuaded them to attack the human colony and the Citadel itself. Geth infiltrated the Citadel – I remembered it perfectly, because I was there at the time – and then were stopped by Commander Shepard.

I almost took my sidearm, when someone's firm hand had caught my arm. I turned to see the Commander holding my wrist and preventing me from shooting the geth.

"Don't. He's on our side. His name is Legion."

I was speechless. A friendly geth? I gazed at each person who stayed there: they all seemed to be relaxed and not bothered by the geth's presence. I shook my head.

The Commander released me and introduced the others. Flight Lieutenant Jeff Moreau and Lieutenant Commander Ashley Williams. I didn't know anything about Mr. Moreau, but I recognized the woman. She accompanied Shepard when he was chasing Saren, then two years later she became the second human SpecTRe. I could understand why she was on the Normandy now – the Council would probably want to to keep fingers on the pulse and put their own agent near the Commander.

I looked at the people. Three men, one woman and one... Synthetic person. Five in total.

"Er... Commander, you told me there were six people on board, but there's only five," I said. Shepard hadn't answered yet when a blue ball appeared in front of me. The same voice, that I guessed was a VI's, pronounced.

"Commander counted me in, I assume," the blue ball glimmered as it spoke. "My name is EDI. I'm the Normandy's artificial intelligence."

Another AI on board? I felt my head spinning.

"Is that everyone who was on board when the crime was committed? Where was the other part of the crew?"

"They were – and they are – on their shore leave, and the Mess Sergeant went to the Citadel Wards to buy food at the time the crime happened," replied the commander.

I told Shepard that I'd have to question each of the main suspects in private. Shepard acknowledged it and suggested starting with him. He also told me that it couldn't be a completely private interrogation, because either Vega or Williams must accompany him everywhere. I didn't mind.

We took the elevator to reach the first deck, where Commander's cabin was. Miss Williams followed us. The cabin was very spacious, unlike cabins on the most Alliance's ships. It had a double bed, an aquarium and even a stand with many models of various ships. Also it had a table with a terminal and a photo on in. I couldn't tell who was on the photo, because the Commander turned it down the moment I looked at it. SpecTRe Williams smirked behind my back.

Shepard told me that in the day, when the crime had been committed, he had spent almost all his time here in his cabin. He also said that when Rupert Gardner told him that the pancakes were ready, it was Williams' turn to guard him and that Vega left for the CIC. After that, the Commander and Ashley weren't out of the bunk until the evening, when Gardner reported that the pancakes had disappeared. Williams confirmed Shepard's story.

"Where do you think Lieutenant Vega went after he left his post?" I asked.

"He always comes down to chat with Joker... Er, Jeff Moreau, our pilot. I guess he went to him," replied Miss Williams. "I don't think it was him, though... Well, I don't know."

"Who do you think it was then?"

"As I said – I don't know," Ashley shrugged. "But whoever it was, I'm certainly going to throw him out of the airlock..."

After that I came down to the cockpit, where I found Vega and Joker. Both confirmed that they were there during the Gardner's absence.

I couldn't figure out any sufficient theory as to who might have stolen the pancakes. Everyone there had an alibi and I doubted that it could be Legion or EDI. They didn't take part in those "pancakes parties."

"You can find Legion on the third deck in the AI core. You also might want to look at the crime scene – it's on the third deck as well," the AI spoke to me. I shrugged.

"I don't see any need to question Legion. But the crime scene..." I sighed – this whole investigation was absurd. - "Yeah. Okay, I'll look into it."

When I entered the mess hall on the third deck I noticed the cooking place, which was fenced with cop's crime holo-bands. I went through it and knelt near the fridge, from which the pancakes had been stolen. I put my arm inside and suddenly found something. It was a piece of cloth, which probably was torn off when somebody was dragging something out of the fridge. I looked at the stripe – it had a SpecTRe logo on it.

Suddenly I noticed something else. There were a few drops of dark oil on the floor. I scanned them with my omni-tool. The result was unexpected – it was a rare type of oil, which was used only for one type of a weapon – the Widow anti material sniper rifle. Thinking about these clues I went into armory.

The SpecTRe Williams was already there. She said, that Vega was with the Commander now and that she had weapons to check out. That's when I paid attention to her uniform – she wore the standard SpecTRe issue. I asked if Shepard wore the SpecTRe uniform as well. Williams laughed and answered that he prefers Alliance's uniform.

I pointed out two Widow rifles in the end of the armory and asked whose they were. Ashley said that the first one was Shepard's – he never allows anyone to touch it – and the second was Legion's. She also said that she had never touched his rifle either, because he put "some crazy tech in it."

A sudden realization kicked me off balance. I still couldn't say what was the motive, but I already knew who was the thief...

All six suspects stood in front of me. Commander Shepard, James Vega, Ashley Williams, Jeff Moreau, Legion and EDI's blue ball. Everyone was waiting for my verdict. I started:

"The thief left two clues on the crime scene: the first is this stripe..." I put the stripe with the logo on the table in front of the people. "My first thought was that it was done by one of the SpecTRes. But Commander Shepard doesn't have the SpecTRe uniform, which means that Miss Williams remains the only suspect..." humans seemed to be ready to tear Ashley apart. "But!" I continued, "The thief also left a few drops of a rare oil, that is used only by two people on this ship – by Commander Shepard and Legion. But Commander Shepard was under the constant oversight of Miss Williams. Which means..."

Everyone turned to Legion.

"Before you're out of the airlock..." started Ashley, "...tell me: why did you try to set me up?"

"But he couldn't do this alone," I continued. "The cameras in the mess hall didn't catch Legion at all that day. It couldn't have happened without certain crew member's involvement."

Now everyone was looking at EDI. The blue ball glimmered.

"I guess we should tell the truth, Legion," said EDI.

"We consider this inevitable," answered the geth. "We truly organized the thievery. We are ready to accept your judgment."

"Commander," I turned to Shepard. "I think you should consider not punishing him."

"We'll decide this ourselves. Thank you, detective, your job is done here," the Commander was clearly mad at the geth.

"Still, I suggest you listen," I pushed. "I did some small research – today a fund that helps children who suffered after geth attack on Eden Prime, received a large amount of the pancakes from an anonymous person with a note: 'We are sorry.'"

Everyone fell silent. Then Shepard cleared the throat:

"Well... I guess Gardner won't mind baking new pancakes. Thank you, detective..."

An hour later I was driving to my home, thinking about what had happened back on the Normandy. About what a wonderful, miraculous place it is. I also wondered if Legion would get some sort of punishment.

I smiled. My job was done, the thief was found.

Mission accomplished.


End file.
